Why Do I Fantasize About My Boyfriend Cheating On Me

Are you finding an answer to why do I fantasize about my boyfriend cheating on me? Then this article may help you to find an answer. 

If you are fantasizing about such a thing for a long time, then it is probably because you are holding a fear in your subconscious mind. 

Let’s find out what can be the reasons why you are fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you…

These can be the reasons why do you fantasize about your boyfriend cheating on you…

Reasons why do you fantasize about your boyfriend cheating on you

  1. You might be in a bad relationship earlier

One past experience of a bad relationship may lead you to fantasize that your present boyfriend is probably cheating on you. 

See we all have made some mistakes in our past lives, but those mistakes cannot determine our present and future. If you allow your bad memories to take control of your present relationship, then you are creating the problem yourself. 

You might have made a wrong choice in your past but that doesn’t mean that your present boyfriend is also your wrong choice. Give yourself a chance to grow, overcome your past fears and nurture the relationship you’re currently into. 

  1.  You’re doubtful about him

Aren’t you being doubtful about your boyfriend? There is a chance that you are fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you because you don’t trust him properly. 

It can also be because of your past experiences. Maybe you’ve trusted your ex so much but he broke your trust and now you’re unable to trust any other man easily, though you’re showing that you trust him but deep inside you know that you do but not completely and this thing leads you to fantasize these things. 

  1. Maybe your boyfriend has done something

Okay, after delving into some other reasons, let’s find out if your boyfriend has done something so that you’re in a fear that your boyfriend may cheat you someday. 

If so, then you’re not completely wrong. In this case you’ve to talk to him about your feelings. You need to express to him that you’re in a fear of losing him and that’s also because of his past behaviour.

He had done something in the past, maybe not intentionally or unknowingly. But if it has created an impact on your subconscious mind that your boyfriend may have cheated you again. Talk to him and think how you can get over this fear. 

  1. You don’t trust him

Trust is one of the most important factors of a healthy relationship. If you don’t trust your man, then you may get into so many problems. 

Some people generally have trust issues. They can’t trust people easily no matter what they are doing- good or bad. If you are also one of them and because of this you’re fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you, then you must resolve this problem by yourself or if you really feel this is a growing problem, you can consult a psychiatrist also. 

  1. You may want an open relationship

Some girls want to be in an open relationship where some boys want to stay private about their love life. If this is the case with you, then most probably this is the reason for your insecurity, why you’re fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you.

Most boys like to stay quiet about their relationships until it is permanent but girls; not everyone, but some have a tendency to showcase their love life through social media or by discussing with their friends, and if they don’t get the same approach from their men, they start feeling insecure. 

  1. You are not getting the commitment
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Some girls want to get committed as soon as they get into any relationship, but I’ve seen so many boys who have a fear of commitment. They don’t want to get commited so easily. It’s not because the man is not serious about his relationship, but he has a phobia of getting commited, maybe because of his past relationship failure. 

If you want commitment from your man but you’re not getting that, you’re most likely to think that your man is cheating on you or can cheat you. Commitment is the strongest part of a healthy relationship.

  1. You’re unfulfilled

If you are not getting your sexual fulfillment, then it can be the reason why you’re forming negative opinions about your man. 

Maybe you’re feeling that your man is not physically attracted to you anymore and so he can have an interest in other girls. During your intimate moments, you are feeling that your man is not into you completely and therefore you are in a constant fear of being cheated.

  1. You’re not getting enough attention

Every girl wants attention from her man and if she does not get that in a proper way she tends to think that her boyfriend is cheating on her. 

See, you also need to understand that your boyfriend is also human too and it is not possible to pay attention to you everytime. He can be in work pressure, he can be in some trouble. Therefore you need to understand him also. Don’t judge your man so easily. Everyone needs some space and your boyfriend is not out of them. 

  1. You’re upset with something

If a person stays upset with something,then he is most likely to have negative thoughts. If you are upset with something and your boyfriend doesn’t ask you about that, then it can be a reason why you are fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you.

Extreme stress, work pressure can make our brain machine-like and therefore if we don’t get any according to our will, we form a different opinion about incidents and facts. 

  1. You’re probably not into the man

If you’re fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you, then it can be because you’re not completely into the man. 

Human psychology works in a different way. When we don’t like a person, we try to find faults in them and even if they haven’t done anything, our mind tries to create some negative impression about him as we don’t like the person.

If this is the problem you’re dealing with, then you must find the answer whether you like the man or not. Don’t try to make your heart love him. It’ll not help, rather will make the situation even worse. 

Now, one more question will arise- Is it normal to fantasize about being cheated on? Let’s try to find out that answer also…

Is it normal to fantasize about being cheated on?

The simple answer to this question is NO! If you’re not being mistrusted, there’s no reason to fantasize such a bad thing. 

You’re in a good relationship with your partner. There is no issue between you both. Then why are you fantasizing this? It’s because you’re overthinking about your partner or it can also be the reason that if any of your friends has gone through a break up and has shared the story with you, the story has created an impact on your mind and brain. That impression is now creating a story in your subconscious mind and so you’re fantasizing about your boyfriend cheating on you. 

Source: Getty Images

Don’t focus on the negative things that are happening outside. There are also so many people who are really happy in their relationship. See them, take the good things from them. Enjoy your relationship. Don’t just spoil your love, your energy and your emotions by focusing on negativity and then creating a negative impression within yourself. 

Understand one thing, fantasies are something that comes only when you’re thinking about that particular topic in your subconscious mind. There may not be any particular or concrete evidence about the thing you’re fantasizing. You’re fantasizing because you’re simply overthinking. Trust your partner and understand if there’s nothing to think about then you don’t need to think either. 

Now, it’s not a problem that you’re alone dealing with. We need to understand Why do a lot of people fantasize about being cheated on?

Why do a lot of people fantasize about being cheated on?

There are so many people who are currently having trust issues in their lives. If you are among them, you need to overcome them first. 

People fantasize about being cheated on maybe because they’re not getting enough attention, enough fulfillment or enough involvement from the relationship. But that cannot be a valid reason.

If your partner is not into the mood of talking or going out or getting intimate, that doesn’t mean that he is cheating on you. NO. Everyone is a human being at the end of the day. Everyone is dealing with some issues in their lives. Every time it is not possible to share each and every detail. Give yourself some time and your partner also.

If you hold your thinking that your partner is cheating on you when he is not, you will start to get detached with him. Negative thoughts lead to negative results. As a result of this you’ll start to react in a different way. Gradually your partner will notice the strange transformation of your behaviour and will also start to get away from you. Probably that’ll lead to a break up and that too without any reason. 

So far we’ve discussed the problem, now I need to share the way to get over this problem…

How Do I Stop overthinking my partner cheating?

Overthinking is something that needs to be stopped as soon as possible. Otherwise it’ll lead to a greater problem. 

When you are in a relationship, you need to give time to the relationship. Understand each other, give respect and be compatible enough. 

Don’t judge your partner for any random reason, rather try to understand his intention. Talking less or remaining silent doesn’t mean that you’re being cheated. 

Yes, if you have noticed something about him then you can raise a question and that is not illogical. 

Live in the moment. Enjoy every moment of your relationship. If you’re facing any problem with your partner, try to solve that by talking and understanding the issue. Don’t overthink. Feel the love and care and intimacy. Enjoy spending time with each other. Go out for dinner on the weekends. Give up all the negativity. 

Why Do I Fantasize About My Boyfriend Cheating On Me
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Now, I’m going to answer some of the Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)…

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)- Why do I fantasize about my boyfriend cheating on me?

I fantasise about my husband sleeping with other women. Do I need help?

If you’ve seen anything about him so that you can suspect then you’re not wrong but if it is only a random thought occurring to you repeatedly then you should go for some help. Because fantasizing this thing without any valid reason may lead to some disorders which can hamper your relationship. 

Why am I obsessed with my boyfriend cheating on me? 

It can be because he had done something in the past that you cannot forget, but if it’s not so, then this obsession needs to be cured. 

Why do I keep thinking my bf is cheating on me?

It’s maybe because you’re overthinking. Spend some time with yourself. Have a good self-talk. Ask yourself if he has done anything that is suspicious. If not then try to get over this thought. If necessary, consult a professional. 

Why worrying about cheating is pointless? 

This is a matter of discussion. Worrying about cheating is not pointless every time. If you see something suspicious then you can be worried. If not then there is no reason for worrying. 


Fantasizing is a good thing in a relationship but only if you are fantasizing good and healthy things. Fantasize being with each other every moment. Thik how you can make each other feel special every time. Feeling insecure without any reason is simply illogical.

Your insecurity can ruin a happy relationship and even the attachment that your partner has for you. You need to trust your partner first. If you have trust issues, solve it as soon as you can. A good self-talk sometimes helps a lot. Understand the importance of every moment of being together. Feel the love he has for you. 
Remember one thing: Love Can Conquer Anything.

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