My boyfriend sleeps really well. He goes to bed at 10 pm and gets up around 6 am. I don’t know what is going on! I am getting tired of waking him up throughout the night to go to the nonstop washroom or just talk to him. Is he sick? Maybe he is depressed? What should I do?
I have been dating my boyfriend for about two years now and we are both 21. We live together, but I am not sure if we are exclusive yet. I haven’t had sex with him yet, but I want to. I love his body and I think he feels the same way about me. But I feel like I need to wait until we get closer before having sex. When we first started dating, I was sexually active, but I haven’t done anything since then. I am not sure if I am ready or if he wants to have sex, though. Should I ask him? If I do, how am I supposed to know if he is really down to try something sexual with me?
I am worried that I might hurt myself if I let him touch me. I have never had sex before, and I don’t know if I will be able to handle it. I am scared that I won’t enjoy it. I want to make sure that I am ready for sex before I start doing it. I’m still figuring out who I am and what I want. I’m confused about whether I’m ready or not and on top of that he sleeps so much which made me so confused.
Apparently, there can be many scenarios for why my boyfriend sleeps so much!
Here is what you should know about him
Men have a different amount of sleep than women do. Men tend to need less sleep than women. A study done at the University of California San Diego (UCSD) showed that men slept for 6 hours and 15 minutes while women slept for only 5 hours and 30 minutes. But don’t worry if you are a woman, you still get plenty of rest. You just need to make sure you are getting enough quality sleep.
If your boyfriend doesn’t get enough sleep, he won’t be able to function well. Tired people aren’t productive, which means they will be less likely to accomplish their goals.
So let’s look at the different scenarios your relationship might going through, What could be the possible reasons for;
why does my boyfriend sleep so much?
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1. He is tired
He may not feel it yet, but he is probably already starting to get sleepy. When we are tired, our body starts producing less adrenaline (the hormone that makes us alert) and more cortisol (the hormone that makes you sleepy). So if you are feeling sleepy and tired, chances are he is too! For this, you can read my “ why am I so tired around my boyfriend”
2. He is depressed
Depression can cause people to start sleeping excessively. Also, when someone feels sad, they often feel fatigued and need to sleep more.
3. He is got a cold
If he has been coughing or sneezing nonstop, he could be keeping himself awake at night. Colds can sometimes make us feel tired because of the extra work our bodies have to do to fight them off.
4. He is dehydrated
Dehydration causes fatigue because our bodies don’t function as well without adequate water.
5. He is under the weather
Feeling sick can really mess with your sleep schedule. Even if you are just feeling run down, try to keep yourself active and avoid naps.
6. He is anxious
Anxiety can affect how much and how long we sleep. People who suffer from anxiety tend to wake up earlier than usual and stay up later than normal.
7. He is just not tired!
If he is not tired, then he is probably not getting enough rest. If he is sleeping 8+ hours a night, then he is probably taking advantage of his time off work. Make sure he gets plenty of rest at home and make sure he takes breaks throughout the day to exercise and get some sunlight.
8. His body is telling him something.
Your body is always trying to tell you what is going on inside of it. Your body is constantly releasing hormones and chemicals that keep you alert and aware of your environment.
When your body feels unwell, it sends out signals to let you know how it’s feeling. You may have noticed that if you are feeling sick, you will start to feel worse after a certain amount of time spent awake. That is your body letting you know that it’s time to go to bed. Don’t ignore these signs!
9. He is stressed.
When your mind is busy thinking about things, your body doesn’t have time to relax. Stress affects your body physically and mentally. If your boyfriend disappears when stressed you can read my “ boyfriend disappears when stressed”
To help your boyfriend deal with any stress, try to spend quality time together doing fun activities. Go to the movies, play video games, cook dinner, etc.
10. He is bored.
Boredom is a huge issue for many people. Boredom makes us want to do anything to fill our time. We will watch TV, surf the internet, read books, and even play video games.
Try to find ways to keep him entertained. Do something different than watching Netflix and playing video games. Get out and enjoy nature. Take walks around the neighbourhood together. Playing sports. Get into some meaningful conversation together if you and your boyfriend don’t know how to have a meaningful conversation you can read my “ my boyfriend and I don’t have a meaningful conversation”
11. He is depressed.
Depression causes people to lose interest in everything they once enjoyed. People who suffer from depression often become withdrawn and isolated from others.
Depression makes people feel hopeless and helpless. It makes them think negatively and can cause them to withdraw from social situations.
12. He is lonely.
Loneliness is a big problem nowadays. There are so many distractions in today’s world that we don’t have time to connect with each other. Loneliness makes us crave human interaction, but when we don’t have anyone to talk to, we end up talking to ourselves. Try to spend more time with him. Talk to him about your day. Tell him how you’re feeling. Ask him questions. Find ways to show him that you care.
13. He is looking for love.
Men need love to survive. A man needs someone to share his feelings with. He needs someone to hold him tight and tell him that everything is going to be okay. Men looking for love in their partners, friends, family members, and even strangers.
But sometimes men fall in love with women who aren’t interested in giving back to them. So if your boyfriend isn’t happy with his relationship, he could be looking for love elsewhere.
How to make a sleepy boyfriend active?
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1. Make him sleep on his back
This is a classic way to get someone to stay asleep without having to force them. If they’re already sleeping on their back, just flip them over onto their stomach. If they wake up before you do, try turning off the lights and playing some soft music.
2. Have sex
Make sure you have plenty of lube handy! You might want to experiment with different positions (on top? Doggy style?) until he gets comfortable enough to go down on you. Keep in mind that if you’re both tired, it’s probably best not to have sex right away. Sex should only happen after you’ve been awake for at least 8 hours. That gives your body time to recover.
3. Give him a massage
If you are feeling particularly energetic, give your partner a nice long relaxing foot rub while he’s still asleep. It will help him relax even further and keep him from waking up.
4. Drink milk
Milk contains protein, which helps muscles relax and promotes healing. Plus, it tastes good. Drink a glass of warm milk before bedtime and you might find yourself nodding off much faster than usual.
5. Get him drunk
Drinking alcohol is known to induce sleepiness, especially in men. After you have had a few drinks, take advantage of your partner’s slumber and start tickling them under the arms. He won’t know what hit him!
6. Take a bath
A hot tub is ideal for inducing deep relaxation, and your partner will thank you later. Just make sure you don’t let him fall asleep while you are in the tub together.
7. Play loud music
Music relaxes people, and since your partner loves listening to it, chances are they’ll love being around you. Turn on some mellow tunes and dance around the room.
8. Be romantic
Be romantic with him. Tell him how much you love him and how handsome he looks today. You want him to know he is special to you.
9. Plan something fun
Plan something fun together. Maybe you could take a day trip somewhere or plan to watch a movie.
10. Give him a massage
Give him a nice relaxing massage. Massages are known to relax people and if he likes being pampered he might actually enjoy it.
11. Get him out of the house
Get him out of the house. If he is working late at night then maybe you could go out for dinner. Or if he works early in the morning then maybe you could go to breakfast. Just get him away from home.
12. Play games
Play some video games together. Video games are great ways to pass the time and they’re fun!
13. Give him a job to take care of.
If you don’t know how to keep your man busy, ask him to help you around the house. He will feel useful and appreciated. And if he doesn’t mind helping you, maybe he will actually enjoy it!
14. Keep him occupied during the day.
If you are trying to get your man moving, you have got to keep him interested. Take him to lunch or go shopping together. Ask him to join you for a workout session. Don’t forget to reward him for being active; give him a massage or buy him a gift card to Starbucks.
15. Be honest.
Be upfront with your man. Tell him how you feel and tell him about your concerns. Let him know what you would like to work on and what you would like to improve in your relationship. A little honesty never hurt anyone.
16. Make him laugh.
Laughter is a great way to relieve tension and bring people closer together. Laughing together makes us happier and calms our nerves. So find ways to make him smile. Play jokes on him, tease him or tell him funny stories.
17. Show him affection.
Make sure you show your man lots of attention. Kiss him, hold hands, and even cuddle. Being physically close to each other helps you bond and builds trust.
Wrapping it up
Men generally need 6-8 hours of rest per 24-hour period. Women however only need 5-7 hours of rest per 24 hours.
If you are wondering why I am telling you this, it is because many people think that sleeping is bad for your body. But in reality, getting enough sleep actually helps your body function at its best.
So if your boyfriend/husband sleeps too much, don’t worry! It is not bad for him. In fact, it is good since he will probably feel healthier and happier.
But if you are a guy who doesn’t get enough sleep, then you might want to consider taking some action. Like something to help you sleep better.
Have a regular bedtime schedule. If you go to bed at 10 pm and wake up at 8 am, then you should set your alarm for 2 hours later (10 am). You should aim to get 7-9 hours of sleep each night.
Don’t use electronics near bedtime. Your phone, tablet, computer, etc. should be put away at least 30 minutes before bedtime.
Avoid caffeine after noon. Caffeine is a stimulant and causes insomnia. Try drinking decaf coffee instead.
Exercise regularly. Exercise increases serotonin levels in our brains, which makes us sleepy.
Make sure you are eating well. Eating right is essential to having quality sleep.
Relax before going to bed. Take a warm bath, read a book, listen to calming music, meditate, pray, write down goals, etc.
Sleep on your left side. Sleeping on your left side keeps your blood flowing towards your heart, which prevents heartburn.
Get rid of clutter. Clutter creates anxiety, which makes you tired.
Reduce light exposure at night. Light suppresses melatonin production, which is the hormone responsible for making us sleepy.
If he sleeps too much after all this and still feels tired around you then Here are some tips to help you get him motivated and back on track:
Make sure he is eating breakfast – he should be having 2 meals per day
Make sure he isn’t skipping workouts – they both benefit him physically and mentally
Don’t let him smoke pot after he gets home from work – he will be tired and won’t be able to focus